"Starting a new show that you are truly excited about, is like falling in love", I said to my friends after the first table read.
Think for a moment: what do those early weeks of falling in love feel like in your mind? In my experience, you start this whole new chapter of your life that subtly changes you; changes the way you plan your weekends, your daily routines alter, and you have new milestones in your life to look forward to, like taking that first trip or celebrating an anniversary.
I was recently cast in a musical that I am so excited to be a part of! This show came into my life like all great loves do: when you are not looking for them. I already knew I would be involved in the production side of this show and later decided to audition as well. I had to remind myself that every time I think I should maybe scale back on time commitments and not audition for something, that once that opening night rolls around, I always end up being in the audience or backstage helping, kicking myself for not doing everything I can to be on that stage. It's like when you are already friends with someone that you actually really want to date. It is such a blessing when you finally have the nerve to ask them out before a friend of yours does! In these cases, it is always better to just go for it, commit fully to something, especially when you love it so much. There is always a way to make your time work.
Upon sitting down with the cast for the first table read, I was struck with goose bumps, happy tears, and so many new daydreams about future rehearsals and the moments that would soon follow under the stage lights. As a collective cast, we spoke every word in the script, laughed heartily at the witty lines, and swayed to the score music, knowing that these musical tunes would be stuck in all of our heads for the next six months. That is the part of doing a show that truly brings people together; its developing that 'shared consciousness'. It's knowing that for a period of time, we are all imagining the same story in our heads, all dancing at home to the same soundtrack, and collectively working and praying we make this show as strong as our best imaginings. It's the shared consciousness that binds us together as a new family.
As we approached three quarters of the way through the first table read, we got to this part in the script where my character sings a solo and literally "blesses the show", and I immediately could imagine how amazing this would feel to perform on stage. A little 'show within the show' moment. I could mentally time travel to the moment where I could feel the warmth of the stage lights, the itchiness of the costume that you are now bound to be sweating in at this point in a hot summertime performance, and could see the the eyes and smiles on the other actors faces on stage. When you are in a role that you really want, you can already experience it with all of your senses when reading it on the page.
A table read is like a first date. It's all new and you don't exactly know how the dynamics are going to mesh together, but when the chemistry is there from day one, it's magic and you immediately get attached. As I get older, I love that I have discovered what feeling in love feels like, and can now recognize that same emotional process emulated in my other passions.
Being an actor is such a fabulous thing, and to me, anytime you have an audience and go into a mental space where you use your imagination actively to create something and become something, is acting. That is why, in my own day job at Elevation Hall, I cluster 'modelling as acting', 'dancing as acting'; any type of character development is acting. Even public speaking, where you activate your imagination to perform as your best self, is acting.
In short, I have totally fallen in love....with a new show. This love has already changed my future and altered my daily routines. I now start my day by reading a few lines from each scene and spend my free time daydreaming choreography.
May you always have love in your life by staying connected to the things you are most passionate about.
Written quickly with her morning coffee:
Leah Hamilton...a girl smitten by her new script.
